I thought that with the cleanse I'd have this insomnia licked, but I did have a couple of glasses of wine tonight as a reward for a good day of painting. Big mistake, after so long without the steady stream of stimulants that my body was used to, said body decides to fire itself into an incredible state of upset, mild headache, stuffy nose, stiff forehead/shoulders etc. (it almost feels like an allergy, now that I think of it) so here I am 4:28 in the morning and wide (a-freakin') wake, bad move Mr.Hahn. So most of tomorrow/today will be write off spent feeling hazy minded and trying to recall why I'm standing in the Dominion doing my shopping wearing one slipper, one cowboy boot , a balaclava and no pants.
I'll really have to burn this feeling out of my system ( Dear Lord, how far will I have to walk tomorrow before this unhealthy feeling is forced out of my body- What Lord ? Oakville you say!) but it has left me with much room for thought, since I can't lie in bed I'll jus' set here for a spell. If you know me you know how I feel about beds, beds are made for three things 1) sleeping 2) crosswords with a beautiful warm body in pyjamas helping with the clues and 3) what comes somewhere before 1) and after 2) .
So the cleanse must be embraced with a (cuddly) vengeance, it's interesting how quickly, if you aren't careful you can start slipping backwards and I am committed to not letting that happen. I will be the first to admit that it's hard, after living the past few years with the most aggressive "Instant Reward System" on Earth, that's what working in the Theatre is all about isn't it folks ? Work hard/play hard and don't stray too far from the formula - thank Christ I don't have to deal with that system anymore, I could write a book,( it would mostly be scribbles but if professionally bound and carrying an ISBN Number it would still be a book) in fact it's probably been a year since I've painted a Set, God that feels good, not that I wouldn't paint another if asked, or seek the employ if I had to, but wow - a year.
Random Obs before I try again
1) My anger is subsiding finally, it has been such a long time, years, since I've felt angry, it was strange to be intimate with it again, how often will it happen in this sober lifestyle ? How long was it blunted before or was it just the right emotion for the right time ?
3) How many Irishmen...
4) How long before this Guinness contract really starts zipping along ? (or see Number 3).
5) To be absolutely fair to the Institution of Theatre I was never happier than in my Second Season at Blyth when we'd gather in the Carp Shop in the morning and play Jennyanykind's "Up Early Every Morning" and drink our coffees and dance together, getting psyched for the day - I swear that summer is one of the best in my memory and will probably be a parting thought when I die.
Many thanks to Andrew Cull and Dave Surette wherever you guys are, God Bless New Baby Morgan, the Rev. Matt and Karen , God Bless Ike Reilly, Smokey Robinson, Kasch and Mason
A.S Hahn
madcraftshoppe@hotmail.com
